Throughout the last couple of months we were consistently asked this question from many of you:
In case you didn’t understand the message above, the question:
Do you have any cool smartphone tricks that you use when you’re on a date?
Maybe it’s because we no longer live in the 1920s, but it seems very apparent that smart phones are a big part of our lives and it’s time you made use of them. You may notice from the text messages we show you guys that we all have iPhones. So, in honor of the new iPhone 5 being announced today, we’ve dubbed this move the iPhone Earbuds Technique.
You’re on a date with a hot girl and it’s going well, but not well enough. This means the conversation is fluid and fun, there is a sexual vibe between you two, and yet, you’re not getting physically close with each other. You think to yourself, “Why can’t I just have the balls to grab her face and shove my tongue down her throat.”
Calm down, and understand if you lack experience your aggressiveness can be seen as date rape. Please, be careful. There is an easier way to transition her mouth to yours.
1. Charge your iPhone
2. Upload 5-7 of your favorite songs to your phone
3. PACK EARBUDS IN YOUR POCKET
Do not pack headphones, pack EARBUDS. I repeat, EARBUDS.The reason is earbuds are manufactured solely for tongue to tongue action. Don’t believe me? In each earbud there is a left and right ear speaker where two people can use either side to have a song sharing experience together. How many times have you shared your iPhone earbuds with a friend?
What we’ve noticed is that when we shared a song with someone by separating the individual earbuds pieces, our heads would be tilted with the other party. This is when we knew how powerful earbuds would work during a date.
The hot girl and I would be walking together in an alley way, or some other romantic scenery, when my gut feeling would tell me that I needed to make a sexual move. To go on a quick tangent: the more dates you go on, the more you’ll soon realize there are points during your time with her that your gut is going to tell you to make a move. And, if you learned anything from us, we always tell you to follow your gut. Of course, experience will teach you the difference between being a potential rapist to something much cooler than that.
So there I would be on our date, when I would suddenly stop for a second and…
Me: There is a cool song I want you to listen to
*Pull out your iPhone with your earbuds*
Her: What song?
Me: It’s one of my favorites, The Climb by Miley Cyrus
Her: Hahah, what?
Me: Just listen. Here…
*Put one earbud in your right ear, and let her put the other in her left ear*
Do you see what’s happening here? The Earbud Technique forces your heads to come close to each other. I told you earlier to upload no more than seven songs because if by the end of the seventh song you’re not making out with her, you’re being a chump. Since your faces are already touching each other, it’s in your best interest to go for the makeout rather than bore her with your music collection.
Believe it or not, when I first did this move, I was very nervous, anxious, and full of other bitch butterfly emotions. This will more than likely happen to you as well. It’s something you’re not used to and it requires some planning. But, it’s worth it because getting physical can be scary and this move can help with this fear. So no excuses, get this done.